A Weighty Subject

I am hesitant to talk too much about my weight-loss and new obsession with exercise, because people typically respond by apologizing for what they eat or explaining why they can't work out.  Also, there tends to be a habit of over sharing on Facebook that makes people really irritated when all you post about is the amazing workout you just had.

Rest assured that when I expound on the subject of health and fitness I am not a) analyzing or judging your food, or b) claiming that any of my work outs are ever amazing. Seriously, I think people who post this are lying with a capital L. There is nothing amazing about the amount of sweat my body produces.

But this is my blog, and the truth is, heath and fitness has become a huge part of my life, so to not talk about it, or the accomplishments that I am so proud of, would be to omit much of what consumes my everyday.

And, because I have not gone on a bunch of fad diets and still enjoy things like chocolate, queso, and Chuy's creamy jalapeno sauce (all of which are proof of God's love for His children), I think it is important to tell my story and what I've learned about my relationship with food and exercise over the past two years.

Below are a few of the things that have helped me lose 30 pounds over the last year and a half. (Full disclosure, though I am ashamed at this first number.  I have gone from weighing 195 to 165 and wearing a size 16 pants to a size 10.)

Food is fuel
I never started this journey with the intent to lose weight, nor did I even think I was starting a journey at all.  In September of 2011 I was starting rehearsals for my 3rd show with Masquerade Theatre and realized that in order to make it through 3 hours of singing and dancing each evening I needed to eat something pretty substantial for dinner.  I also realized that I could not hang with the 20 year-olds in my cast who could go eat Whataburger at 10:30 p.m.  So I decided to try My Fit Foods.  Fit Foods provides fresh, healthy, pre-portioned and hugely flavorful meals that are high on healthy, lean protein, veggies and complex, gluten-free carbs.  My local HEB has a Fit Foods kiosk, so when I went to the store for groceries, I picked up enough meals for the week.  3 minutes in the microwave netted me a healthy meal that gave me the energy I needed to rehearse and kept me full so I didn't end up eating junk when I got home.  The longer I ate these healthy meals, the more I noticed how my body would respond to less healthy options.  While good food made me feel energized and light on my feet, junk would weigh me down and leave me feeling sluggish.  For the first time, I understood what it meant to view food as fuel.  I could really see the difference in how my body and mind performed when given the right nutrients.

Food is not a reward or a comfort
I can't tell you how many times I would get to the end of the week and think, "I've had a great week.  I deserve some queso," or "I've had the worst week.  I deserve some queso."  I've used food as a reward and comfort for most of my life.  I think many of us do, maybe without even knowing it.  Or we work out a lot so that we can eat whatever we want and not feel bad about it.  You know, "I worked out every day this week, so I deserve some queso."  Here's the truth though:  food will never provide you with the recognition for a job well done that you long for.  Food will never comfort you in the way you need it to.  And if you aren't disciplined enough to change your eating habits, you can exercise all the time, but you won't see the results that you want.  I have had to become very mindful not only of what I eat, but why I eat it.

I have never been "starving."
Around the same time I started changing what I ate, I had a serious "aha" moment when I saw a panhandler begging for food on a street near my home.  You see I spent a lot of time up unto that point thinking about food.  I would no sooner finish breakfast than be thinking about what I would have for lunch and dinner.  I looked forward to my next meal with an eagerness unmatched by much else.  But as I sat at that stoplight, looking at a haggard man who didn't know when or where he might eat again, it was as though God Himself appeared in my passenger seat and said to me, "Have you ever been in a situation where you didn't have something to eat?  Where you didn't have more than enough to eat?  Have I ever let you starve? Then why do you spend so much time worrying about and obsessing over your next meal?"  Wow.  This realization hit me at the core and has stuck with me ever since.  Food had become an idol in my life and an area where I chose not to trust God.  This shift in perspective, all thanks to a man with a cardboard sign, has been crucial in freeing me from the weight on my body and my soul.

Exercise is mostly a mental game
When I started P90x this summer, I didn't believe my body would be able to handle the daily, intense and sometimes crazy, hour-long workouts.  But it can and it has.  My body adapted quickly to the demands I was putting on it (thanks to the fact that I was fueling it for optimal performance).  I am convinced that God designed our bodies to do amazing things.  I mean, if you've ever given birth, or been privileged to see a baby be born, you know that the body is the most miraculous of God's creations.  So why then, do we say that we can't exercise?  Why do we let minor aches and pains derail us?  Why do we choose to sit instead of walk or run?  I think the problem is mainly in the mind.  The more times you think "I can't,"  the more times that thought is etched deeper into your brain.  For example, I am not, by nature, a runner.  But it is a good form of exercise that challenges me and makes me feel better, so I try to incorporate it into my weekly routine.  It only takes about 5 minutes of running for my brain to decide that I am tired, or that something hurts, or that it is too hot/cold, or I am bored, or any number of other reasons I shouldn't be running-all forms of "I can't." In order to overcome that, I have to trick my brain.  I have to think about all the other times I've run my neighborhood successfully.  I have to think about my goals and the satisfaction of checking off this run from my list.  Sometimes I have to picture that I'm running with Tim Tebow and RGIII.  We all know they wouldn't quit, and I don't want two people that I admire to look on me with pity as they go the extra mile.  It's one part invisible competition and one part shaming, I suppose, but it works.  While we do need to be in tune with our bodies and shouldn't work out with a serious injury, I think there are a lot of times when our body is perfectly capable of doing, but we talk ourselves out of it mentally.

I never took a "before" picture, but a quick look at my FB pictures illustrates the difference.  Plus I would hate to have a long post without some pictures to look at :)  So here's some befores:

Summer 2009

Fall 2010

Spring 2011

And the afters (all from Fall/Winter 2012):

And as the pictures illustrate, my husband has gone through his own amazing transformation.  He is all muscle!  I am so proud of his focus and determination.